@lawyerthoughts: First they ignore your fanny pack, then they laugh at your fanny pack, then they see you eat gummy bears from your fanny pack, then you win.
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@funnybeachgirl: If I ever met the Dalai Lama, I would ask him a question that has plagued me my entire life. "What color do Smurfs turn if you choke them?"
@TheBeerGuy73: *goes to the gym* *takes a selfie & posts it on Facebook for the wife to see* *hurries to the bar*
@badbanana: If you tell me you're a fan of One Direction, please clarify if you're referring to the boy band or Kim/Kanye's baby.