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@MarfSalvador: Cop: My informant told me where the killer is Chief: Nice. Did he give you a name? Cop: No chief *frowns* my parents did that
@TheAlexNevil: Survival Tip: if a bear comes at you, do not try to "sweep the leg". They've all seen The Karate Kid and learned how to defend against it.
@sarousti: Hot tip: Apparently it's frowned upon to make the sound effect tssst when being blessed by a priest