@obviousplant_: Follow these tips for a happy Thanksgiving. Printable version available on FB:
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@TheDailySchmuck: They say all of this started because Eve ate an apple. Clearly, the book was altered. Everyone knows it had to be chocolate.
@IRLPepperMD: "This is the police! Put your hands up where I can see 'em!" "But I can't-" "Now!" *t-rex panics*
@daemonic3: Everyone, meet our new baby, Lucian "Aww, what a nice name" It's her dad's, so I picked his middle name "What is it?" Theskywithdiamonds
@LoveNLunchmeat: *gets called a psychopath *googles "What's the average IQ of a psychopath?" AWWW, HE THINKS I'M REALLY SMART.