@BedheadBunny: For $60, this printer ink had better be hand squeezed out of endangered squids.
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@Malocallidus: What if Daft Punk is just a couple of rad old ladies who met in knitting club and shared a love of sick beats?
@nattylumpo88: I wish Kristen from finance would tell us her husband was an "attorney" one more time so I could feel better about shitting in her purse.
@dsmitty62: Today is "bring your dog to work day". I thought it was "bring your dawg to work day". So now DeShaun has to leave. Sorry dawg
@Cheeseboy22: Every time my dentist is kind enough to tell me I need to floss, I am kind enough to tell him that he needs to trim his nostril hairs.