@JosesLovesYou: For a hero, it's pretty cool that Mario is just a dude who ignores his real job, does mushrooms and smashes his head into things all day.
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@RorynotRoy: I wish someone would hold me and tell me that everything is gonna be okay and then just kinda turn into like $20,000 in cash.
@LoveNLunchmeat: People who say losing weight is "just math" clearly have no idea how far out of my way I go to avoid math.
@SteveKoehler22: Turkeys are crazy. They hunch down and freeze in groups in grocery store coolers to elude hunters. Must be a safety in numbers thing.