@vladchoc: For job interviews, your best bet is to dress as a pizza delivery person, march in and say "Who ordered DILIGENCE and ATTENTION TO DETAIL!?"
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@Brampersandon_: JUDGE: so u plan to plead insanity? ME: let me double-check with my counsel *moves 2 ft over, puts on tie, nods* ME: thats correct ur honor
@jonnysun: BARBER: what'll it be ME: can u make me feel extremeley self-conscious for 45 minutes BARBER: u got it
@TitansHomer: Failed biology because apparently the answer to "what is commonly found in cells?" Isn't "Blacks and Mexicans"