@stuartrutten: For lunch today, I think I will have a blistering hot bowl of ice cold soup. Thanks microwave.
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@somelightcrying: I'm a businessman so I tuck my shirt in. There's a lot of money on the line so I need you to know that this is roughly where my legs start.
@internetluke: "No, no. No! NO!" - guy who invented black ski masks after people started using them for robbing
@WilliamRodgers: TRUE STORY Just made this restaurant change its "All you can drink Brunch" Policy.