@Hobo_Splendido: For the low, low price of $14.95, I'll send you my instructional DVD, "How to Succeed as a Con Man."
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@Baldylockzzz: Nothing says " My divorce didn't go as planned " quite like the guy with grocery bags hanging on the sides of his bicycles handlebars
@Tmoney68: If I could time-travel, forget killing baby Hitler. I'd go back to use every come back I ever thought of 10 minutes too late.
@kcmoore51: 16: My friend is coming to get something while we're gone. Me: Should we leave a key? 16: No, she'll just go thru the doggie door again.