@bingowings14: For what I lack in imagination, I more than make up for in something else.
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@GriffonTaylonYo: Soldier: WE NEED MORE AMMO QUICK! Me: [sweating bullets] um will these work Soldier: [amazed] you son of a gun
@imdaintyaf: Hub: You ready to go? Me: In a minute, I'm beating the kids. [Cut to me just decimating the kids at Mario Kart]
@doktorj: *lies down on waxing table Aesthetician(on phone): Cancel all my appts, check the moon phase and bring me a gun loaded with silver bullets.