@LaytesAgain: For women, the worst part of a breakup is probably that incessant little voice whispering "Do something stupid to your hair."
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@TheToddWilliams: COP: Your home was robbed ME: Dang I had a self-designed alarm system C: Didn't work M: Back to the drawing board C: They stole that M: Dang
@vineyille: If you like piña coladas / Getting caught in the rain / Drink this piña colada / It was caught in the rain
@mdvaldosta: Ladies: we're not fooled by your PMS trickery. I see how happy you are in those tampon commercials.
@wolfpupy: at the grampys, about to anounce who won the grampy award. open envelope. its grandpa!!! you did it congratulations