@pixelatedboat: For you sir I would recommend one of our deluxe funeral plans where I won't dig you up and slap you around when I'm feeling mad at skeletons
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@markydoodoo: DAVID BLAINE: *cracks open egg, butterfly flies out* ME: cmon man DB: *cracks open 2nd egg, 9 of clubs pops out* ME: I'm so hungry, David
@AaronFullerton: I bet the frankincense guy was all like, "Let's put the three items in one gift basket and the basket can be from all of us."
@thenatewolf: ME: If only there was an instrument that sounded like a really sassy duck. CLARINET PLAYER: [excitedly moistening his reed] Buckle up baby.