@mynameshank: Forgets to set alarm, wakes up 3 days later.
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@SCbchbum: Officer pulled me over & asked if I knew what the speed limit was, like I'm getting paid to tell him his job.
@jngraphs: When I had no money, I had few friends, but no enemies Btw, I still have no money, in case you were thinking of becoming my friend or enemy
@PanicRestroom: Always stand up for what you believe in, unless what you believe in is sitting down.