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@funnybeachgirl: "Forgive me father, for I have pinned."
@AlexvanBeek: EVERY SENTIENT & NON-SENTIENT CONGLOMERATION OF MOLECULES ON THIS EARTH HAS A BF. WTF.
@lilgapeach30: Did you mean pacific or specific?
Cuz seriously, one is an ocean.
@danjan13: 100% of murder victims who responded to the survey really freaked us out.
@TimmyPumpkin: *licks stamp*
hmmm tastes weird
hmmm mailbox had wings
*drives home on flying monkey*
hmmm that wasn't a stamp
@novicefather: Past employers have described me as "selfish, egotistic, condescending, the physical manifestation of capitalism, and a true sweetheart."