@MandiAtRandom: Forgot to do laundry again. I bet everyone at work is going to love my prom dress.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: You need to eat vegetables instead of candy if you want to be tall. 4-year-old: I’ll just be small and happy.
@DumbConfessions: Relationship status: can't go to the same bar as last night, because I'm wearing the same shirt as last night.
@GaryJanetti: I hope one day to have the chance to whisper "what's she doing here?" to the person next to me at a funeral.
@Tom_Vom: It sounded like someone on a moped was approaching but it turned out to be 1,000 bees on a regular bicycle.