If you unfollowed someone because you were pissed off at them but they apologize you should be able to refollow without them getting a notification and thus realizing that you unfollowed.
No reason
You Might Also Like
Candlesticks, for when you want to be stylish but also might need a murder weapon.
I asked my dad if he could hang a mirror in the bathroom for me but I guess I should have been more specific because he ended up putting it right over the toilet instead. Oh well, my son loves watching himself pee now.
I still let my Mom make all my phone calls for me, but my customer service center boss is getting annoyed.
LOIS LANE: here i got you these contacts so you don’t have to wear glasses anymore
CLARK KENT: *nervous sweating*
I swear I won’t be undressing you with my eyes again. That REALLY hurt!
Flight attendant: Is anyone on board a doctor?
Me: No, I’m on board a plane haha
Man having a heart attack: ok I’m ready to die now
My parents bought my kid Guess Who with a timer because it’s important that she learns stress at 4 years old
In store checkout behind beautiful woman in sleek black dress. She’s buying tequila and a quart of motor oil.
Sure like to know that story
Me, passing on the wisdom of my ancestors to my kids: It’s “righty tighty, lefty loosey.”
These 3D printers are insane!
Can Jesus turn off his walking on water power, or when he dives into a swimming pool would he just bounce across the surface like a skipping stone?
Today’s religious debate is brought to you by…
Responsibility for the New York earthquake is already being claimed by tremorrists.
My 3yo surprised me with a giant loving hug and then uttered those four magic words: “I did something bad”
So I went to the store and bought 5 oranges, but somehow I lost 2 on the way home. Then when I got home I found I had 3 oranges behind the coffee machine — and now I’m officially the guy from the math problem you hated.
Mother Earth: I’m not a regular mom. I’m a Cool Mom.
[humans pollute the atmosphere and destroy nature]
Earth: This is fine. I’m a Cool Mom
Me: I was bitten by a Karen at Starbucks, will I become a Werekaren!?
ER Dr: No, we’ll just need to..
Me: I WANT TO SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER!
I ate a kids meal at Wendy’s
his mom was furious
ME: What does synonym mean?
MY MOM: It’s another word for something[Later on date]
ME: You wanna get synonym from the dessert menu, Sharon?
People who marry themselves are so silly, like you already live together
I vastly underestimated how many times my toddler would want to listen to Baby Shark on a cross-country road trip.
YOU THINK CONDOMS ARE STUPID???
My 2yr old just cried for 45 minutes because the TV in our car isn’t as big as the TV in our house…
[on drive home]
i cant believe you said “don’t bother” when my dad said he’d be there in spirit
“i don’t want ghosts at our wedding linda”
I dreamt I was drowning in the ocean, and woke up spitting on my pillow.
So yeah, you can say I get pretty wet n wild in bed.
I have a hard time telling the difference between 21 Dragons and Imagine Pilots.
You (drinking coffee): Drugs are bad
Me (smugly injecting heroin): Actually, coffee is a drug
I never understood why they were called chicken tenders until I let one caress my face.
My favourite part of the Bible is when the little guy finally throws his ring into the volcano.
Which letter is the silent one in the word “scent?”
Is it the “S” or the “C?”
The worst thing about millennial parents is that they name their pets human names and their kids pet names. They be like:
“Luna, don’t take Josh’s cone off, he just got spayed!”.
Coworker: “I hate when I forget to eat”
*Me, wiping peanut butter off of my eyebrows*
“Same”