@Douchekevin: Four 6 year old girls playing quietly at 7am is called a horde of elephants having a foot race.
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@Dawn_M_: I stepped on two raccoons today, but I'm just gonna play it cool and wear them as slippers for the rest of my life.
@WarrenHolstein: Don't cut yourselves 'cause Justin smokes pot, Beliebers. Cut yourselves 'cause you listen to Justin Bieber. (And aim for a major artery.)
@Eatingmeals: One time I did mushrooms and played GTA and felt regret for the lives I was taking I was all "Holy shit these people have families"