@Lola_Areola: Four year olds can't even go for cigarettes or anything. Four year olds are useless.
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@DomesticGoddss: I have been successfully sitting in chairs for over 40 years without falling off--a skill I apparently didn't pass on to my boys.
@MisterBombay: I once dated a woman named Kim who hated to be called Kimberly. Then I dated a woman named Chelsea who really hated to be called Kimberly
@DanMentos: [first date] *pointing indiscriminately* "uh-oh looks like we're on the Kiss Cam" there's no- *leans in* there's no Kiss Cam at Applebees