@adamochoa: freak people out in public restrooms by saying "come in" when they knock on the stall door
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@PaigeKellerman: I'm never a more ineffective parent than when I accidentally make threats that rhyme.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: "Ben Carson makes stuff up" said Donald Trump, self-proclaimed zillionaire, demigod and unicorn owner.
@CineRobert: "Waaaah, my boyfriend is a jerk, but I'm gonna tell twitter instead of him because I have the communication skills of a sea anemone."