@TheWadest: FREE IDEA: a tanning salon called "Turn Brown For What."
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@mattZillaaaa: This old lady in the grocery store was just giving me the weirdest looks and the worst piggy back ride of my life
@blondediva11: My mom keeps telling me there are plenty of fish in the sea. She REALLY doesn't get me anymore. I. Don't. Want. A. Fish.
@JermHimselfish: I dream of living in a world where men are judged not by the color of their skin, but by the contents of their iPod.
@SocialustGal13: My superpower is making red lights turn green simply by trying to write a tweet.