@Jojo_51213: Freedom of expression is great... I can make a kissy face, smiley face or a frowny face, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it
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@pixelatedboat: This Easter, please take a moment to remember Jesus and his inspiring message for mankind:
@BradBroaddus: Got in a fight with the wife so I didn't let her sleep on the couch with me last night.
@HonestToddler: Toilet won't stop throwing up. I didn't know it was Legos intolerant. SEND HELP THIS IS NOT A DRILL
@Robert_Beau: My boss accused me of sticking my finger in his BD cake in the break room fridge, but he is completely wrong, it wasn't my finger.