@snmrrw: Rasputin never died that day, as an immortal being. He hid for decades, before dropping the "Ras" and slipping back into Russian politics.

@TheBoydP: Someone said I was racist because I misspelled pico de gallo. It’s like they don’t even know I misspell English words also…

@SirEviscerate: There are no atheists in parking lots where you've dropped your phone face down on the asphalt.

@SortaBad: Manny Pacquiao says he would accept a rematch with Floyd Mayweather. "Yes, I will allow you to pay me another $100 million," he told sources

@juliussharpe: A guy just came into this restaurant by himself, ordered a plate of olives, ate them, and left. If you see something, say something.