@LionJenkins: Friendly advice: Don't compare your girlfriend to an avocado. Even if she IS the good kind of fat.
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@MountainDouche: My grandma has been lying to me for years. A watched pot really does boil. Moral of the story, trust no one.
@bigbrez100: Bad: I saw my girlfriend's name and number on a couple of men's bathroom walls.. Worse: It was in her handwriting...