@GreenishDuck: Frogs always look like they just found out there's no free Wi-Fi.
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@audipenny: Do you think the rattlesnake is ever embarrassed that he has a stupid baby toy at the end of his string body
@davedittell: MY HOT WIFE: want to go down on me? [three minutes later] *riding my wife down the water slide* YEAHHHH
@Sarcasmo718: Taking your shirt off when fighting is a great way to tell the cops who to arrest.
@Book_Krazy: Fitness coach: have you been exercising & doing push-ups? *Flashback to me running after the ice cream man & buying all the push-ups* "yes"