@illTortuga: From now on, when you see the word "minimum", good luck trying to not imagine a tiny British mother.
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@Vodkantots: 9: My teacher doesn't wear makeup like you do. I guess she doesn't need it because she's younger. Me: Get out of the car.
@david8hughes: [family game night] Me: do u understand now, grandma? U understand the rules now? Mum [tappin my shoulder]: she gets it. Loosen the headlock