@JGrumbie: Fully clothed mom just waded into the pool to grab her devil spawn child that was ignoring her. She's my new favorite.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@upsidedowntrash: GF: You cant keep it. ME: But- G: Its a BEE. M: HES my FRIEND! G: Hand him over. M: No! [tearing up] I wont let you hurt Albuzz Bumbledore!
@robyn_vo: It's so annoying when attractive people say they're ugly just to get compliments from people, ugh if I weren't so ugly I'd do the same thing
@Sorrowscopes: Aries: You will be visited by three ghosts this Christmas. They're all married, so don't even ask.
@imskytrash: cop: could you please describe the man who tried to kill you me: yeah he was not nice