@JGrumbie: Fully clothed mom just waded into the pool to grab her devil spawn child that was ignoring her. She's my new favorite.
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@Adam14: I use my teethbrush then go play feetball and commit arms robbery. Just giving you a head up. - people with the right amount of body parts
@GloriaFallon123: A woman told me at dinner she liked me because I'm "not afraid to eat bread"--so I'm done with socializing for at least a year thanks
@DiamondLou69: It's amazing how fast the first 30 minutes of work just fly by when you show up a half hour late for work.
@averagegrades: whenever a man says he's well endowed I always hope he means with a grant from the government for his new art project