@KateWhineHall: Fun Fact: If you hear small kids running around laughing hysterically, within 2 min. at least one will be on the floor crying hysterically.
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@thenatewolf: *showing mom how to use her phone* What's the blue button with the bird? THAT BUTTON GIVES YOUR BANK INFO TO TERRORISTS NEVER TOUCH IT!!!!
@josePhDhoran: "Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor"- John joyfully sings as he walks off with the 'Caution: wet floor' sign
@OneFunnyMummy: My kids have enough energy to run 10,000 laps around the house but get tired walking around the block. I call bullshit.
@Sirrruh: Life has taught me if you go to the store for milk and you're high, you won't buy milk. You will spend half your rent on hot pockets though.