@meganamram: Fun fact: Peanut butter also sticks to the roof of your ex-husband's BMW
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@GodlessUtopia: "I'm not usually religious, but..." - Dan Mintz #LGBT #gayrights #equality #atheist #ReligiousFreedom . .
@RxitWounds: [Auto-shop class] "Cody, for the last time, it's still a carburetor even when it's in a van" *raises hand* "Or a truck" *lowers hand*
@TheWoodenslurpy: Your secrets are safe with me because I literally won’t remember them. This also applies to your birthday. Your birthdays are safe with me.
@Br00klyn_BeAr: Do girls imagine themselves sucking in a invisible spaghetti when they're about to take a picture?