@bourgeoisalien: Fun prank: tell your kid World War II ended by the Americans dropping an F-bomb on Japan. Then later when his teacher calls, act shocked.
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@JasonLight73: If the camera adds 10 lbs. & Mirrors don't lie..Why in the World would a Woman ever take her picture in the bathroom mirror? It defies logic
@OwensDamien: In an attempt to build some exercise into my daily routine, I’ve put the biscuits on a higher shelf. Boy, I’m gonna be sore tomorrow.
@murrman5: can we have one night where you don't act like spiderman "ok" [hour later a bird/panther type thing steals wife's purse] "don't look at me"
@ANNIEwayyyy: Sorry I thought your older sister was your daughter and then made everyone else at the restaurant guess your age.