@sara_ashlynn: Fun trick: Swap guacamole with wasabi, then watch.
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@briangaar: And I don't want to hear people from imaginary places like Finland telling me that 57 degrees isn't cold, save it for the elves, Santa
@TheMichaelRock: My boss said to "treat customers like you treat your mother", so I haven't answered my phone in a month and I have 74 unheard voicemails.
@Ristolable: Did you see that? That's the third time she came over here. I think she likes me. "This is Applebee's and she is our waitress"
@daemonic3: "Hi" My name is "What?" My name is "Who?" My name is [chka chka] Slim Shady *scribbles on cup* "Ok Mr Shrimp Scabies, I'll start your latte"