@VodkaThursday: Gave up on my dream of being a murderer a long time ago. I leave long hair everywhere & everyone knows its mine without doing a DNA test.
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@JermHimselfish: I wasn't entirely comfortable slaughtering that goat under the light of a full moon but grandma's gravy recipe was very specific.
@Tommytoughstuff: Career day: Hi kids I'm Bills Dad and I work at the local morgue. Who wants to pet a dead body?"
@kwirkyKerri: The spider I let live in my kitchen is letting the bugs run amok. No free rides! Your days are numbered missy.