@Sorrowscopes: Gemini: You may find yourself wondering if you're dreaming or not. A simple test is to punch a cop in the face.
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@clemwin: HAD LOTS OF ESPRESSO. TWEETING FROM THE MOON. I LIVE HERE NOW. IT IS NOT MADE OUT OF CHEESE. 1 OUT OF 5 STARS: NOT RECOMMENDED
@DomesticGoddss: Mom Math: If Child A has 2 scoops of ice cream in his bowl, and child B has 1 3/4 scoops, how many days will Mom have to hear about it?
@HatfieldAnne: I need you guys to take my phone away from me. It’ll probably take a couple of you to do it. I'm a biter.
@SortaBad: If I lost a leg in an accident the worst part would be never being able to flush a public toilet again