@MoistPork: Genius move, Romeo & Juliet, for killing yourselves instead of getting married and spending the rest your lives wanting to kill each other.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ericonederful: Fellas, If you kill a spider while you're at her place, congratulations. You will be having sex. P.S. Bring a spider.
@bombfunk75: - Deletes FB account - Leaves Social Media - Moves to Himalayas - Pigeon comes with a note - Opens note - Candycrush request
@PajamaStew: "How about if the villain is a psychopath out to make a skin suit?" - Not in a kids movie, dude. "Ok, but it's puppy skin?" - Oh, then YES!
@ChaseMit: My girlfriend's car got stolen today, so if you see a man driving a dark green Honda Civic, PLEASE tell him I left some Skittles in there.