@neiltyson: Geologists are important for our understanding of rocks on Earth and on other planets. So never take them for granite.
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@Home_Halfway: WINNIE THE POOH: There's a rumbly in my tumbly ME: Use regular words you half naked glutton
@Qckhd: Girlfriend kept nagging at me to put the toilet seat down. So here I am, crying in the middle of a field, with the seat & a shotgun.
@DaddyJew: The only problem with teaching little kids to share is that sometimes they want some of my stuff
@robin_991: The scariest moment in the world is when a 3yo looks at you and says CLOSE YOUR EYES AND OPEN YOUR MOUTH