@michelleisawolf: George Clooney has done so much for the world. All of it to try to get us to forget that he was a terrible Batman.
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@AimeeHelene1: I feel like I might kill someone today, and I'm starving. So clearly the best solution is to just eat someone.
@3sunzzz: The closest I've ever come to being a 'hunter and gatherer' is opening my own pistachios.
@tastefactory: [robbers outside bank] When I said get some masks I meant something creepy like wolf masks "But can't u feel your pores really opening up?"
@IamEveryDayPpl: That awkward moment when you flirt with a guy whose staring at you in the Waffle House, but really he just died there with his eyes open...