@SashaBrenner: "Get your fax straight!" - a tweet that would have been so funny in 1987
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@Cool_Jesse: When I wrote "Spiritual" on my online-dating profile, I meant I like to watch 'Ghostbusters'.
@ElleOhHell: "The new iPhone 6 is bigger!" Meh. "It has more sensors!" Pfft. "You can block group texts." I WOULD LIKE ONE THOUSAND OF YOUR IPHONE
@BuffaloHomo: Instead of being frustrated that you only have a 140 character limit just be thankful that I do.