@dataisplural: *gets caught kissing an optical illusion* it's not what it looks like!
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@cepheusjackson: ME: The plane has wifi? Sweet, I'm going to Skype call that radio psychic. RADIO PSYCHIC: Go ahead caller, you're on the air ME: HOLY SHIT
@skylerhanrath: If you want a medical degree, they're literally hanging on doctor's walls. Grab one.
@itsdivbaby: when i hear fat people say that they've made mistakes, i always think to myself, "yeaa...at the grocery store."