@AllyBallyBeal: Getting a text message from your ex is like getting a message from Satan on an Ouija board.
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@GBRougecity: I don't believe in reincarnation but damn my dog looks like he's trying to crank over a motorcycle while he's sleeping.
@bitchofficially: I'm gonna start a woman's monthly magazine called "Period", and some months I will send it out late to freak out subscribers
@erica_rosie: Just received a thank-you card from someone I sent a thank-you card to. Oh, it's on.