@NinjaSweatpants: Getting asked 'you want a fork' by a hot Chinese waitress is misleading as fork to my american ears
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@PaperWash: [Signing waiver for the show Cops] No no, you don't have to blur my face but how about a sweet mustache?
@HollyHeals: Ever have the shower curtain touch you unexpectedly and start karate chopping the air?? No, me either.
@nealbrennan: Sorry for illegally downloading your music, guy who mostly makes songs about doing crime.