@matt___nelson: [getting escorted out of zoo] "I just wanted to see if the panda knew kung fu like in the movie"
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@NotBachibawlz: I yelled at my wife "Your miniskirt is way too short!!" "Thats because its made for a woman" she replied "Now take it off & give it to me"
@LizHackett: If you're robbing my house, just bring a second guy to eat a pizza in front of my dog while you take whatever you want.
@dumbbeezie: I hate it when you have french fries and all of the sudden people are acting like they like you
@thetits: GOD: there, my first animal :) SNAKE:youre not done right? How am I supposed to move? G:like this*shimmies* S: G:just kinda*shimmies* S:dude