@neiltyson: Getting straight "A"s does not guarantee success, but plenty of evidence shows that not getting "A"s doesn't preclude it.
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@agathagotstoned: Barring any distractions, it only takes about three months to teach a meerkat how to throw knives.
@usermcuserface: I love them whole heartedly. I love it when they play with me, and I eat their table scraps. I am essentially my kids dog.
@clindsaysway: An obese old man who breaks into your house at night? A tiny flying woman who buys your dead teeth? It's a wonder children can sleep at all.
@NikkiNeverAgain: Was told I can't use Wi-Fi at McDonald's unless I eat. So I am bringing a peanut butter sandwich.