@JohnHilsen: Getting to know someone is a lot like making toast; don't do it in the bathtub.
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@Jake_Vig: "You see those footprints? It looks like our killer had feet." - If you want to know why I was fired as a writer on CSI.
@david8hughes: [overhears girl at work crying because her grandad & her dad died this month] Me: not all men are like that
@juliussharpe: I bet "Fifty Shades of Grey" won't make that much money because most of the people who want to see it are tied to a bedpost.