@badbanana: Girl, are you a glass of water because I think you're about to throw yourself at me.
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@AimeeHelene1: I had a dream I killed someone, and all I did was panic about being caught...and cry. Now I know I'd be a terrible murderer.
@matt___nelson: JUDGE: I hereby sentence you t- PENGUIN COURT REPORTER: *angrily smashing keyboard with flippers* CAN YOU GUYS SLOW DOWN A BIT
@markleggett: How many kids do you think Wolverine has? Because a vasectomy would heal in seconds and he doesn't look like he'd wear a rubber or pull out.