@imagine_vegas: Girl, I like you so much, I might even let you hold my phone....some day, while its locked
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@SteveSuckington: What's the smallest amount of money you would reach into a toilet to get? Mine is a skittle.
@turdfailure: I didn't get far in Mario. I thought the guy floating on the cloud was God so I just accepted it when he threw shit at me
@Playing_Dad: Welcome to passive aggressive club. We're so happy you came twenty minutes late. Sure, get a cup of coffee, we'll wait.
@wienerherzog: The Goonies went looking for pirate treasure and ended up finding the greatest treasure of all: pirate treasure.