@imagine_vegas: Girl, I like you so much, I might even let you hold my phone....some day, while its locked
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@Home_Halfway: ME: Is this Babies R Us CASHIER: Yes ME: No babies work here C: I know ME: It should be called Babies Were US C: ... ME: Get me your manager
@RobertMorschel: I asked the waitress for a quickie and she slapped me. The old woman next to me said, "It's pronounced 'quiche', dear."
@Marlebean: The biggest threat of punishment for my daughter is saying I'll pick out her clothes for school.