@briangaar: Girl, my life is full of tragedy. In 1997, my girlfriend was killed by a guy named Sephiroth. AND she was our party's only healer :(
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@nonsensetwit: If I had a daycare, I think it would be awesome to get each kid to wear one of those backpack-leash things and make them pull me on a sled.
@OtherDanOBrien: ME: I'm a creep. I'm a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? I don't belong here. GUY: I love that song. ME: What song?
@david8hughes: [at the gun store] Me: I'll take that gun & a box of ammo Clerk: that'll be $250 Me [with a gun & a box of ammo]: no