@ScottLinnen: Girl, yo grammatical atrocities so huge, you need typosuction.
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@SatansTongue: *Vladimir Putin dining* I want Russian fries "They're French fries" Not for long *crosses Ukraine out on agenda & lists France* Not for long
@HomeProbably: I asked for the phonebook, my girlfriend called me an antique and gave me her phone. I don't care, the spider's dead.
@merseytart: Woman on CNN talking about London's streets being eerily quiet. Mate, it's Sunday. They're not cowering in fear, they're having a lie in.