@SkinnerSteven: Girl you got more red flags than a well played game of minesweeper
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@WoodyLuvsCoffee: Airline just told my GF she has too much baggage & they've only known her a couple of minutes.
@GetCougarized: Whenever a guy boasts he has a party in his pants, I always ask him to prove it. If he's not packin nachos, beer and M&Ms, I'm going home.
@PaperWash: vampire waiter: would you like to order? customer: I'll have a steak vampire waiter: [sweating nervously] what...wuddya need a stake for?