@SkinnerSteven: Girl you got more red flags than a well played game of minesweeper
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@mansizedthumbs: Little did he know that his foot powered filing system would have made him billions if he had only thought of a better name - The Ped-o-file
@QwertyJones3: MY DAD: Foreigners in this country need to learn English. ALSO MY DAD: I heard you got a new hi-bird car.
@XplodingUnicorn: Wife: You put the wrong date on this. Me: Oh, yeah. The year change always messes me up. Wife: You wrote 1992.