@SkinnerSteven: Girl you got more red flags than a well played game of minesweeper
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@KyleMcDowell86: ME: I need to return this blender WALMART EMPLOYEE: Why? ME:(thinking about how i broke it trying to blend rocks to make sand) "Its haunted"
@SteveSuckington: Good call inventor of glass tables. There's nothing more appetizing than realizing Aunt Mildred doesn't wear panties while I'm trying to eat
@PrettyNBoots: Deactivated my FB. Before the final "submit", they show you pictures of "friends" that says "These people will miss you". Best laugh ever.
@VerbsRProudest: Taking a nap now. If you're tempted to wake me, please remember Jurassic Park. Just because we can do it, doesn't always mean we should.