@LordofScribble: Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Slap a man with the same fish and the video will go viral in under 48 hours. #Truth
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@JBelk78: You think I'm over dramatic? When an octopus gets upset, it eats itself. THAT'S over dramatic.
@AimeeHelene1: *goes in fridge; makes sandwich* *grabs beer* *sits on couch; turns on TV* Him: Ma'am, this is an open house Me: I need the full experience
@NickSchug: If I worked at a pizza place I would use pepperoni to spell out "Marry me?" on pizzas all the time just to make things awkward for couples.