@NotJPo: Give a woman a compliment and you'll eat for a day. Force a woman to fish for compliments and she'll feed someone else.
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@TheHyyyype: PREGNANT WIFE: oh my god, my water broke! ME: ok stay calm, i know what to do *googles "how to fix water"*
@Jake_Vig: Average Guy: [writes her a song] Girl: "Yeah, whatever." Hot Guy: "Sup." Girl: "Oh my god, you're so creative!"
@SenatorBigfoot: "How's Mason doing?" Ugh, he's going through this emu kid phase. "Don't you mean emo kid?" *boy covered in feathers runs past* I wish.