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@rpbateman: Give me a minute, I can make this about me.
@oakhillbargrill: Spreads legs... Nope
Spreads two other legs .... Nope
Spreads two others .... Dammit, no
Spreads last two.... BINGO!!
- spider sex
@Ristolable: "Is there really a fire? Prove it." -Mrs. Doubtfire
@badteacher4u: I tried playing hide-n-seek with my friends newborn and now I'm not allowed back inside that hospital :(
@ThePocketJustin: If you pretend you're skimming you can straight up throw rocks at people.
@JustinGuarini: Have you ever accidentally ended a business call with "I love you?" Oh yeah me neither.