@UNTRESOR: Give your Mom what she really wants today. Accept her Facebook friend request.
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@Dschnoeb: I bet Egyptians were all like "Yo, nobody in history will ever worship and revere cats like we do" and then came the internet.
@SilleVio: Joined a street protest. Suddenly a shot, panic and everybody started running. 3 hours and a gold medal later I realised it was a marathon
@DaddyJew: Gf: come over Me: can't, playing the new call of duty Gf: my parents are out of town Me: you're 30 years old, grow up
@mydmac: There are 2 kinds of people in this world; 1. People who like math A. People who hate math 3. People who really don't understand math